Self-Knowledge IS Knowledge
Art Credit Esther Rai for L. Scappaticci
Lately I’ve been struggling through what I call a “self-knowledge challenge.”
Two weeks ago I stepped out of a job that was a vocation for me.
It gave me deep purpose and direction.
And until about a day ago, I felt adrift.
Yet I left this job because of a very clear spiritual directive.
Kind of like a text message in all caps...
“HEY LAURA! SOMETHING IS COMPLETE.
WE KNOW THIS IS WEIRD AND YOU WON’T BELIEVE US.
BUT YOU’VE GOTTA GO.”
No bad feelings. No new job. Just this mystery “text” from the spiritual world.
Dang it was a struggle to listen. But eventually I did.
Self-knowledge made this leap possible for me.
And here’s the thing…
Self-knowledge isn’t just personal knowledge. It is knowledge in service to the world. And if I can get a little lofty with you all, it’s what will help humanity evolve and thereby, um, save the world.
Almost all spiritual/esoteric world views, as well as any emotional well-being model, or even the entire bestseller rack at your bookstore points to self-knowledge as the key to growth and connection.
As usual, I’m going to get practical and give you a little exercise to try.
Let me break self-knowledge down into all the “levels” or “planes” we live on.
Material Needs Level:
We need to acknowledge this as a “plane” of activity because acting all spiritual without recognizing basic life needs is bull &*$. I wouldn’t have been able to leave my job without a certain amount of financial privilege in the form of my partner’s stable job. That assisted the rest of my tuning in.
Physical/Body Level:
My body was giving me loud messages.
In a session with a spiritual guide/therapist/friend, I tried to figure out the perfect conditions that would allow me to stay in my job. A checklist I could give to my employer to help me feel more “balanced.” And then I felt like I was going to puke. In fact, I had to take a break, drink some water, eat a banana and then FINALLY admit I had to resign. (I still didn’t listen for a little while, but more on that some other time…)
Life-forces Level: Life force, if I can simply explain it, is the animating force in our bodies and our world. It works across the physical and emotional. It is pretty easy to perceive with people, animals, plants. You can sense when your plant is losing life-force and dying, your child is exhausted, or when your animal is run-down or “off.” But it is often hard to sense in ourselves. The term “burn-out” is connected to depleted life force. And sheesh, I was there.
Soul/Emotional Level:
I was getting grouchy. Super grouchy. And I was falling into a pattern that’s been there for a long time, a pattern Pilar Lesko, in this interview with my brother, Conner Habib) says “feels like home.” A place where old trauma and patterns are so familiar that you go to them again and again even though they aren’t serving you anymore. I was in an old emotional struggle with myself that I was, in part, projecting onto others. Blech.
Spiritual Level:
My intuition is strong. But I haven’t always trusted it.
I can trust it now because of consistent spiritual practices, including meditation, writing, and deep conversations. Now that I see the layers of spiritual connection to my physical/soul reality, I pay attention. I don’t think it is only my “feelings,” directing me, whether anxiety or dreamy wishes. It’s a more complex equation of thinking, feeling, and tuning-in. I know it is nudge from the spiritual world/universe to get me going in the right direction.
So because it’s me and you here, let’s get practical.
Try This Self-Knowledge Exercise
Jot down or ponder the levels you think you have the most self-knowledge and the levels in which you’d like to grow.
Take that intentionally into your sleep tonight. See if you awaken with a new thought or dream, and/or observe what shows up for during your day tomorrow. Maybe in a conversation, maybe in an article or post you read, maybe in a memory that suddenly appears.
Here’s a clue….
Sometimes self-knowledge can be more obvious around wounds or wounding experiences. You learn a lot about yourself when you’ve been hurt, in the material needs level, physical body level, emotional level, or even the spiritual level as my Spiritual Autobiography worksheet can help reveal.
Share with me…please!
So what leaps have you made where self-knowledge directed you? I especially love stories of reluctant leaps! Share them with me on Instagram @laura_scappaticci.com or by emailing me directly at connect@laurascappaticci.com
Meet me on the mountain of laundry...we’ll evolve from there.
